Wednesday, February 17, 2010

No news

I don't really have any adoption news to report.  It's really a painfully slow process.  The other day at work we were looking at some baby photos and one of my coworkers asked if seeing the pictures made me want another one.  I managed to say yes without crying so that's good.  Only a few people at work know about our adoption plans.  I told one of my friends at work, because I tell her everything and  she was one of my references.  I also told HR because I had benefits questions.  HR encouraged me to tell my boss, so I did.   He literally had no reaction, so I'm not sure what to make of that.   I just told him as a courtesy since I will need some time off from work and I do not know how much notice I will be able to give.

Why is it that now that we're starting the adoption process it seems like everyone we know is pregnant?  I seriously know at least 7 people who are pregnant or just had a baby.  Don't get me wrong, I am incredibly happy for each and every one of them.  I won't lie though - it's hard.   It helps somewhat that we have the process going to focus on, but sometimes I can feel the jealousy and bitterness try to start creeping in.

I'm trying to focus on the positive.  I am blessed to have 2 beautiful daughters and a wonderful husband who all love me very much.  We have good jobs in a shaky economy and have a nice, safe home to live in.  So this one little detail - the fact that our family is not complete yet - should be very minor.  It's minor like a splinter.  Really small, but it hurts a lot.


  1. (((hugs))) You have every right to feel this way and one day when you are holding your sleeping baby and reading back to this day, you'll be able to appreciate the struggles you went through to be so blessed.

  2. ((hugs)) It's not minor, really. But you are taking the steps, however slow they are, to complete your family.

  3. Thank you! It helps to feel like someone out there understands. :o)

  4. It's so hard to respond to the questions sometimes, isn't it? I have grown to hate it when people ask if Jamie and I have plans to have children, and it seems like it happens all the time. At least once a week. Ugh. How exactly do you answer that when you're in our position??